Hope Against Odds: Deirdre Raysor’s Journey to Overcome Infertility
Deirdre Raysor, a US Army veteran with a doctorate in psychology, grew up in Miami, Florida. It was there in 2002 she met her husband, Anthony, while serving in the military. While “it wasn’t quite love at first sight,” Raysor shared, Anthony caught her attention. She describes their love as a “high school sweetheart” kind that will last a lifetime. Marriage followed, along with a desire to raise a family.
In 2003, their life took an unexpected turn. Raysor was diagnosed with stage four endometriosis. This painful and debilitating condition affects millions of women worldwide. Despite multiple surgeries and treatments, Deirdre struggled with the disease’s effects on her body. In 2006, she was honorably discharged from the military for endometriosis.
“There’s no cure for endometriosis, no matter how many surgeries you have,” she shared. The disease can affect more than your ovaries. Raysor has it on her lungs, kidney, diaphragm, and parts of her heart. “Of course, they can’t take those pieces from me. So, I live with endometriosis.” Despite the pain and uncertainty, Deirdre was determined to become pregnant and be a mother.
Navigating IVF Treatment
After many years and multiple surgeries to battle infertility, Raysor made the decision to undergo in vitro fertilization (IVF) treatments using donor eggs. IVF isn’t quick; each cycle typically spans two or more weeks. Furthermore, multiple IVF cycles may be needed to increase the likelihood of pregnancy. As a result, there can be considerable out-of-pocket expenses.
Raysor spoke of the importance of raising awareness around infertility and IVF treatments for women in the African American community. “A lot of times when it comes to infertility, IVF isn’t talked about. Many feel they can’t afford IVF treatments. But there are ways to afford the treatment,” says Raysor. Raysor wants others to know that they, too, have options.
Discovering the Bob Woodruff Foundation VIVA program
In 2018 while searching for options to help pay for IVF treatments that her insurance didn’t cover, Raysor discovered the Bob Woodruff Foundation VIVA program. Through VIVA, the Foundation provides financial assistance and personalized support to veterans who want to grow their families and may not qualify for Veterans Affairs funding. Since 2017, VIVA has helped veteran families welcome over 70 babies.
Raysor applied for a grant and waited to see what would happen. “And [the Bob Woodruff Foundation] reached out to me!” Raysor recalled enthusiastically. She spoke with Ann Philopena at the Bob Woodruff Foundation; Philopena walks families through the program’s grant process and, when needed, connects veterans to resources outside the Foundation. Raysor says that Philopena “holds a special place in her heart.”
Facing Challenges with Resilience
After receiving the first VIVA grant in 2018, Raysor miscarried at 14 weeks, which affected her deeply. She wanted to give up. Despite the challenges, Raysor remained determined. “I realized I had to stop feeling sorry for myself and have faith that [pregnancy] would happen,” she said.
In 2019 Raysor applied for and received a second VIVA grant. She continued with IVF treatments, undergoing several more cycles. “You can’t dwell on what happened. You must continue to focus on your present because [that’s what will] make your future.”
Over five years, Raysor underwent nine IVF cycles. “Although I went through 13 [embryo] transfers and used six different donors,” she explains, “I never gave up hope.” Today Raysor is expecting her first child.
The VIVA grant alleviated some of the burden of costly IVF treatments. “The Bob Woodruff Foundation was a godsend,” Raysor says. “They provided financial assistance that made the difference in my journey.” In total, each grant covered approximately 50% of the cost of one IVF cycle.
VIVA grants change the lives of veteran families facing infertility. Raysor emphasized the importance of seeking resources and help from others. She advises families in similar situations that “[your] time will come, even if it takes longer than you expected. Don’t give up.”
With generous support from EMD Serono, VIVA connects veterans experiencing infertility with the resources and financial support they need to start or expand their families.
For More Information
Learn more about the Bob Woodruff Foundation VIVA program and how you can support veterans who struggle with infertility and want to grow their families.
If you are a veteran who’s interested in applying for a VIVA grant, contact us at [email protected] or access the VIVA application.
